Death Toll: Survivor Week 1

It's here! It's late... but it's here. And oh boy, how I've missed it. There is nothing quite as amazing as beginning a new Survivor season. I know that sounds incredibly sad, but if incredibly sad is what I have to be to love Survivor this much, so be it.
That being said, I have to stress. I am NOT an obsessive fanatic. I can't tell you every single person's name from every season. But that's also what I love about it. People come and go in Survivor. Some live and some die. Some have legacies and some don't. It's a competition that operates as a social microcosm; one that defines our entire way of life... that is what is so compelling about Survivor. That and the CUHRAZY elaborate challenge apparatuses! Man, they are cool.

The season got off to a predictable start. People complained. A lot. But this should not be seen as a negative for viewers. What seems like a bunch of annoying Americans whining is ACTUALLY the beginning of us knowing who we will come to love and hate. For example, when Leslie broke down and wept because she missed her Bible, I knew I had my antagonist. I hope she sticks around long enough for it to really hurt when she gets left to die.

At the end of the first episode, Chicken was ended. This was an especially satisfying moment, seeings as Chicken was some old retard whose strategy in the game was to offer no input when it came to group decisions. It was a blessing to see him die.

CHICKEN = DEAD

At the end of the second episode, Ashley was killed off. Again, I completely agreed with the group's movement. She was a WWE superstar apparently, but she was totally dirty and her breasts were the size of a megalodon's testicles. She was also a lazy, good-for-nothing whore. No big loss.

ASHLEY = DEAD